We have this issue in our family ( my extended family or whatever is the name for your spouse's family). I am the black sheep in all aspects. Everyone there tries to be polite. They hide their actual feelings towards you (almost always). They try to make you feel comfortable.So, most of the townsfolk heap praises on these people. There is no end to the praising.
But, when you live with them and you know what they think about you behind your back, you cringe. You cringe at their small mindedness and selfishness and pride. You laugh sarcastically when the next person arrives, to praise these people. You mock yourself for being honest and crude. You know, in your heart of hearts how superior (for lack of better word) you are to these people - regarding thoughts. I feel proud that I do not view XYZ the way these well mannered people do. To me, my thoughts and actual inner feelings of a person matter more than my behaviour towards them. I may be rude to XYZ but I am willing to pardon XYZ. I do not speak ever so softly to them and bitch behind their backs. I wish I was better mannered. But then, I feel proud that inside, I am beautiful. I hold people in high regard. I try not to be judgmental. I try to overlook the mistakes one has done. I try to re-start relations on a fresh note. I try to help even those who have failed me. I listen even when all I want to do is to run away from that person...So, you tell me - Are your manners important that your thoughts?
But, when you live with them and you know what they think about you behind your back, you cringe. You cringe at their small mindedness and selfishness and pride. You laugh sarcastically when the next person arrives, to praise these people. You mock yourself for being honest and crude. You know, in your heart of hearts how superior (for lack of better word) you are to these people - regarding thoughts. I feel proud that I do not view XYZ the way these well mannered people do. To me, my thoughts and actual inner feelings of a person matter more than my behaviour towards them. I may be rude to XYZ but I am willing to pardon XYZ. I do not speak ever so softly to them and bitch behind their backs. I wish I was better mannered. But then, I feel proud that inside, I am beautiful. I hold people in high regard. I try not to be judgmental. I try to overlook the mistakes one has done. I try to re-start relations on a fresh note. I try to help even those who have failed me. I listen even when all I want to do is to run away from that person...So, you tell me - Are your manners important that your thoughts?
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