What is happening in the world is, certain people are given priority, importance than others.
Certain jobs are more valued than others.
Certain qualities are more appreciated than others - let's say beauty, intelligence,
In today's world women are feeling the heat at corporates. More women are moving out of their jobs - citing excuses like lack of work-life balance and the need to parent their kids. I think 80% of this maybe false. What they're running away from, is probably being unappreciated for who they are.
For their sensitivity, for being honest, for their empathy, for the extra time they take to do a lot of research, for their lack of aggression or even for being contented where they are. Since no one appreciates these beautiful qualities, we don't feel proud to own them. We want to be like the men. We think we're inferior. We think we can never catch up. So, we quit. This is a long cycle which happens when the society refuses to acknowledge goodness and virtues and only looks at profitability and top line and bottom line. Many people will move out of these qualities and acquire more "business" like qualities so that they can survive and stay afloat.
It's a man's world out there. They set the rules. Every society (by society I mean a group of people - at families or work or outside) likes conformists. You have a bachelor who stays till 11 PM and that sets a certain tone for the workplace. You may end up feeling guilty for leaving the office at 10 PM! You may start feeling you're unproductive! With work times ever increasing, the amount of tasks ever increasing, the number of meetings you attend ever increasing - how do some people do it?
Honest answer - no. They don't. We women think men are smarter and technically better and can do a lot in a day. Yes, there is some truth to it - they're biologically blessed to handle such workplaces but they're not always honest. Many men, I have realized of late, come unprepared for meetings. They refuse to accept their mistakes and slip ups while women start crying the moment we make mistakes. No one even has to notice, we're giving ourselves away.
Men use their aggression and logical analysis to help them get through meetings they are thoroughly unprepared for, whereas we, who have done 20% but lack that aggression and logical analysis (to some extent) stay quiet. We're afraid to ask questions. We're afraid to make others feel bad. We're afraid of losing our reputation. We're afraid to challenge people. We ASSUME that everyone is superior or brilliant. We don't understand that it's a game they play and they do it so well that you don't realize it. All the while you chide yourself for not having done your homework. Where is the time to do the homework?
Again, we're sensitive. We take things to heart. But that is also what makes the world better. If the women stopped caring for men, the world would come collapsing. So, it's not right to be ashamed of one's sensitivity. We care about people. People matter to us. So we're sensitive. Men care abt name and money. They are sensitive to these things! You're sensitive to what you observe the most and what matters the most to you. So, let's accept our sensitivity while we correct any annoying side effects that it brings.
Another thing is - if we didn't do full justice to a job, we honestly tell it to our boss. Have you ever seen a guy do that? End of matter. Every one has good/ bad days. Productive/ unproductive days.
You don't have to feel bad for that.
I have realized that with the right amount of confidence, clarity and research coupled with a little aggression and "I know you're all bullshitting" attitude.. - all of which can be taught, we can bring more confident and successful women to the corporate world!
P.S: A week after this was written I heard this from Gretchen.
http://www.gretchenrubin.com/happiness_project/2014/03/story-i-love-to-see-virtue-rewarded/
How similar are we thinking!
Certain jobs are more valued than others.
Certain qualities are more appreciated than others - let's say beauty, intelligence,
In today's world women are feeling the heat at corporates. More women are moving out of their jobs - citing excuses like lack of work-life balance and the need to parent their kids. I think 80% of this maybe false. What they're running away from, is probably being unappreciated for who they are.
For their sensitivity, for being honest, for their empathy, for the extra time they take to do a lot of research, for their lack of aggression or even for being contented where they are. Since no one appreciates these beautiful qualities, we don't feel proud to own them. We want to be like the men. We think we're inferior. We think we can never catch up. So, we quit. This is a long cycle which happens when the society refuses to acknowledge goodness and virtues and only looks at profitability and top line and bottom line. Many people will move out of these qualities and acquire more "business" like qualities so that they can survive and stay afloat.
It's a man's world out there. They set the rules. Every society (by society I mean a group of people - at families or work or outside) likes conformists. You have a bachelor who stays till 11 PM and that sets a certain tone for the workplace. You may end up feeling guilty for leaving the office at 10 PM! You may start feeling you're unproductive! With work times ever increasing, the amount of tasks ever increasing, the number of meetings you attend ever increasing - how do some people do it?
Honest answer - no. They don't. We women think men are smarter and technically better and can do a lot in a day. Yes, there is some truth to it - they're biologically blessed to handle such workplaces but they're not always honest. Many men, I have realized of late, come unprepared for meetings. They refuse to accept their mistakes and slip ups while women start crying the moment we make mistakes. No one even has to notice, we're giving ourselves away.
Men use their aggression and logical analysis to help them get through meetings they are thoroughly unprepared for, whereas we, who have done 20% but lack that aggression and logical analysis (to some extent) stay quiet. We're afraid to ask questions. We're afraid to make others feel bad. We're afraid of losing our reputation. We're afraid to challenge people. We ASSUME that everyone is superior or brilliant. We don't understand that it's a game they play and they do it so well that you don't realize it. All the while you chide yourself for not having done your homework. Where is the time to do the homework?
Again, we're sensitive. We take things to heart. But that is also what makes the world better. If the women stopped caring for men, the world would come collapsing. So, it's not right to be ashamed of one's sensitivity. We care about people. People matter to us. So we're sensitive. Men care abt name and money. They are sensitive to these things! You're sensitive to what you observe the most and what matters the most to you. So, let's accept our sensitivity while we correct any annoying side effects that it brings.
Another thing is - if we didn't do full justice to a job, we honestly tell it to our boss. Have you ever seen a guy do that? End of matter. Every one has good/ bad days. Productive/ unproductive days.
You don't have to feel bad for that.
I have realized that with the right amount of confidence, clarity and research coupled with a little aggression and "I know you're all bullshitting" attitude.. - all of which can be taught, we can bring more confident and successful women to the corporate world!
P.S: A week after this was written I heard this from Gretchen.
http://www.gretchenrubin.com/happiness_project/2014/03/story-i-love-to-see-virtue-rewarded/
How similar are we thinking!
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