My wise friend Rads said "you should keep relations on the surface.. like the waves.. if you go deep, there is a high chance you will be hurt".. wise words...
I have seen that many relations carry a lot of hurt. Am wondering why it happens and what best a person can do, to not get hurt, to not hurt or to heal oneself after getting hurt....
What I did recently after a totally uncalled for incident was, to just not think about it...or rather not think about it too much... to prevent myself from being hurt again.. or prolong the pain. I think if we carry forward our hurt feelings from everyday life, our hearts will sink in an ocean of hurt and negativity.
So, we should clear the hurt account each day, as much as possible so that the next fresh day can start beautifully.
Also, note to myself: People don't view relations with the same warmth or sincerity as you may do. So, it's better to not go overboard with some relations unless one is certain of closeness.
Also, an eternal trick is: Talk less... even "do less" is good :-)
P.S: After this post was written, I read J.Krishnamurti's page. It so beautifully explains what thoughts are: http://www.jkrishnamurti.org/krishnamurti-teachings/view-text.php?tid=48&chid=56796&w=&
We carry our burdens all the time; we never die to them, we never leave them behind. it is only when we give complete attention to a problem and solve it immediately - never carrying it over to the next day, the next minute - that there is solitude. Then, even, if we live in a crowded house or are in a bus, we have solitude. And that solitude indicates a fresh mind, an innocent mind.
To have inward solitude and space is very important because it implies freedom to be, to go, to function, to fly. After all, goodness can only flower in space just as virtue can flower only when there is freedom. We may have political freedom but inwardly we are not free and therefore there is no space. No virtue, no quality that is worth while, can function or grow without this vast space within oneself. And space and silence are necessary because it is only when the mind is alone, uninfluenced, untrained, not held by infinite varieties of experience, that it can come upon something totally new.
One can see directly that it is only when the mind is silent that there is a possibility of clarity. The whole purpose of meditation in the East is to bring about such a state of mind - that is, to control thought, which is the same as constantly repeating a prayer to quieten the mind and in that state hoping to understand one's problems.
I have seen that many relations carry a lot of hurt. Am wondering why it happens and what best a person can do, to not get hurt, to not hurt or to heal oneself after getting hurt....
What I did recently after a totally uncalled for incident was, to just not think about it...or rather not think about it too much... to prevent myself from being hurt again.. or prolong the pain. I think if we carry forward our hurt feelings from everyday life, our hearts will sink in an ocean of hurt and negativity.
So, we should clear the hurt account each day, as much as possible so that the next fresh day can start beautifully.
Also, note to myself: People don't view relations with the same warmth or sincerity as you may do. So, it's better to not go overboard with some relations unless one is certain of closeness.
Also, an eternal trick is: Talk less... even "do less" is good :-)
P.S: After this post was written, I read J.Krishnamurti's page. It so beautifully explains what thoughts are: http://www.jkrishnamurti.org/krishnamurti-teachings/view-text.php?tid=48&chid=56796&w=&
We carry our burdens all the time; we never die to them, we never leave them behind. it is only when we give complete attention to a problem and solve it immediately - never carrying it over to the next day, the next minute - that there is solitude. Then, even, if we live in a crowded house or are in a bus, we have solitude. And that solitude indicates a fresh mind, an innocent mind.
To have inward solitude and space is very important because it implies freedom to be, to go, to function, to fly. After all, goodness can only flower in space just as virtue can flower only when there is freedom. We may have political freedom but inwardly we are not free and therefore there is no space. No virtue, no quality that is worth while, can function or grow without this vast space within oneself. And space and silence are necessary because it is only when the mind is alone, uninfluenced, untrained, not held by infinite varieties of experience, that it can come upon something totally new.
One can see directly that it is only when the mind is silent that there is a possibility of clarity. The whole purpose of meditation in the East is to bring about such a state of mind - that is, to control thought, which is the same as constantly repeating a prayer to quieten the mind and in that state hoping to understand one's problems.
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