It is very evident now. The existence of 2 structures within me. The old, sad, wimpy, victim kind of soft person and the new assertive, bit aggressive, non adjusting kind of person.
So, when the new structures are enforced I can see the old me screaming and shouting and saying "No, what you're doing is wrong. You need to be more polite".
So, there is conflict between the old structure and the new. It will happen for sometime. Till then interaction with people is getting painful.. especially people who are not in my inner circle. I don't feel like being among people whom I do not trust, w ho do not care for me, who see me as weak. I am no mood to compromise. I feel irritated in such company.
It's fascinating.. When you deeply introspect and see these things, you're amazed. Reminds me again of Eckhart. When the old structures no longer serve the purpose a huge transformation happens.
So, when the new structures are enforced I can see the old me screaming and shouting and saying "No, what you're doing is wrong. You need to be more polite".
So, there is conflict between the old structure and the new. It will happen for sometime. Till then interaction with people is getting painful.. especially people who are not in my inner circle. I don't feel like being among people whom I do not trust, w ho do not care for me, who see me as weak. I am no mood to compromise. I feel irritated in such company.
It's fascinating.. When you deeply introspect and see these things, you're amazed. Reminds me again of Eckhart. When the old structures no longer serve the purpose a huge transformation happens.
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