So many times in our life we encounter people who have some negative straits. Some may be simple traits like lack of hygiene or orderliness.. others maybe a little serious like - engaging in unwanted gossip or extreme jealousy, etc.
What do you do when you notice this? I recently had such an incident and did not know what to do.
I even pointed out to the person concerned that I can see a lot of negativity in their interpretation of things. The person felt very bad. I don't know how bad they felt. It must have hurt their ego a lot.
But what I realized is..I should uphold their dignity. All of us have negative traits. But despite that we should hold ourself or others in dignity. I want to uphold the dignity of people and support them. Everyone needs support. Nobody likes to feel isolated or ignored, no matter how bad they think they are or we think they are. I vividly remember supporting a friend of mine going through a difficult divorce. She was being bitter and cruel to everyone. Everyone had severed connections with her. I still stuck to her despite everyone's objections because she was about to kill herself and at that time, being by her was more important than judging her for her mistakes. Only when she recovers from that tragedy can she think straight. It is then that we can bring change. At that time, I have a choice to sever connections because she does not need my hand. So, each of us needs to analyze when we need to give our hands to others and when is it safe to withdraw the hand. It amounts to crime withdrawing before the other party is ready to stand on their feet.
So, I have decided to be there for this person. I donno what is happening in their life.. how much support they have. I will always think great about them.
"When we bring respect and honour to those around us we open a channel to their own goodness. When they (prisoners) experience someone who respects and values them it gives them the ability to admire themselves, to accept and acknowledge the good inside.When we see what is holy in another, we transform their hearts."
The Dalai Lama embodies this sacred perception as he moves through the world.
"It never hurts to think too highly of a person; often they become ennobled and act better because of it."
What do you do when you notice this? I recently had such an incident and did not know what to do.
I even pointed out to the person concerned that I can see a lot of negativity in their interpretation of things. The person felt very bad. I don't know how bad they felt. It must have hurt their ego a lot.
But what I realized is..I should uphold their dignity. All of us have negative traits. But despite that we should hold ourself or others in dignity. I want to uphold the dignity of people and support them. Everyone needs support. Nobody likes to feel isolated or ignored, no matter how bad they think they are or we think they are. I vividly remember supporting a friend of mine going through a difficult divorce. She was being bitter and cruel to everyone. Everyone had severed connections with her. I still stuck to her despite everyone's objections because she was about to kill herself and at that time, being by her was more important than judging her for her mistakes. Only when she recovers from that tragedy can she think straight. It is then that we can bring change. At that time, I have a choice to sever connections because she does not need my hand. So, each of us needs to analyze when we need to give our hands to others and when is it safe to withdraw the hand. It amounts to crime withdrawing before the other party is ready to stand on their feet.
So, I have decided to be there for this person. I donno what is happening in their life.. how much support they have. I will always think great about them.
"When we bring respect and honour to those around us we open a channel to their own goodness. When they (prisoners) experience someone who respects and values them it gives them the ability to admire themselves, to accept and acknowledge the good inside.When we see what is holy in another, we transform their hearts."
The Dalai Lama embodies this sacred perception as he moves through the world.
"It never hurts to think too highly of a person; often they become ennobled and act better because of it."
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